Suck it Up and Get Over it Princes!

By Maria Anna van Driel,

Let me shock you here for a brief moment! Modern psychology is in the need to restudy and understand the invisible injuries of both PTSD and CPTSD. Because that is exactly what it is…an emotional injury and not a mental illness what has to be suppressed with brain foggy creating medication in the moment one is capable of making a clear distinction between the past and the present. Not to mention this magical antidote, aka forgiveness.

Titled “Spent,” this image by Daniel Sundahl was made around 4 a.m. after a busy night as his partner sat in the ambulance after a call. The repeated exposure to traumatic situations and stress can impact the mental health of first responders. It is time to help the helpers. (Daniel Sundahl,

Say, a police officer has experienced a kidnapping. I mean, their own. He/she has been kept in prison for a certain period of time by a psychopathic criminal, being threatened, being insecure if he/she will survive the situation. Most cops will have these thoughts of ‘Shit, why didn’t I saw this coming? I have been trained for these kind of situations!’

Some therapists will say ‘Hurry, hurry, you have to forgive yourself so that you can move on’. Or what about those people who have experienced sexual abuse as a child or, during their adult years? There are therapist who say, ‘You have to start to forgive, it will give you peace’.

My personal opinion straightforward? F*ck them! If you do not want to forgive the one who has wracked your life, than that is perfectly fine. You should not be forced to do this at all.

What a therapist can do, together with their client, is working towards letting it go. I mean, for the client to start feel comfortable with the fact that it has happened and that it is okay to be angry about it…among others. It is okay not to forgive these sadistic predators…and some people never will.

There are a myriad brilliant therapists who are practicing for years already and their clients are tremendously happy with their listening ear and the treatments provided. They feel comfortable while voicing their minds, experiences and emotions to the therapist. But, unfortunately, when it comes down to 1st responders a huge amount of these therapists are missing the point…big time!

9 out of 10 known and accepted treatments many therapists are familiar with, are not even reaching the first level of PTSD and/or CPTSD 1st responders are dealing with. (regardless if they are retired or still working in the field)

Why? Straightforward, drawing a happy rainbow while bringing up mom not sticking a bandage on one’s knee after a fall on the kindergarten playground, is simply not relating to the mind-set of someone who has experienced, for instance, a shootout, called in a KIA, collected body-parts a psychopathic (serial) killer left behind or have watched a child die. (regardless recently or (…) years ago)

Read the full article on Medium.

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